I could really use a support system for any step parents out

Cssm92's picture
[560]

I could really use a support system for any step parents out there that are in my similar situation. I'm 25, husband is 32. We have 1 child together, she's 1. He has 2 boys from his previous marriage, they're 9 and 10. Full custody, full time step parent here.
I've been in their lives for 6 years now and still having a very hard time.

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Cssm92's picture
[560]
May 16

@norseduncan I will also add their biological mother has been in and out of jail since they were 4 and 5 years old. She has constantly called and threatened my husband (for the couple of months she is able to stay out of jail) to see them, but he refuses. Shes called me names, called him names, threatened his reputation, harassed his mother, broke into my husband's social interaction sites, and more. He received full custody at the ages of 2 and 3. They were then only raised by my husband and his mother. Now I am in the picture and doing the best I can. The women at their church have chastized me about being "mean" to them and spreaded false rumors about me. These boys were worse before I met them. They would throw things at you if they didn't get their way and once even bit me when I told him that it was bedtime. I'm constantly judged and kept an eye on because I'm the step mother. I feel if you have the word step in front of your title your instantly watched closer. I've even told my husband to sit them down and have a 1 on 1 talk with them while I left to see how they feel about me and the rumors that were being spread. We were thinking possibly they started them out of jealousy/ resentment of me or just the certain women of the church who had nothing better to do then stir up drama. Once I returned he told me they acted confused and had no idea what was going on.

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norseduncan's picture
[138305]
May 16

if they were around bio mom they had a bad example, and they likely have a lot of things going through their minds they arent old enough to fully process yet. if they were worse before you met them, then it follows that wha you and your husband are doing is having a positive impact. and who cares what the women at church or anyone else thinks? they are gonna think what they think regardless of what you do

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Cssm92's picture
[560]
May 18

This is true. Maybe I'm a little to worried about what people think of me..my husband said the same thing as you

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