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my father has end stage lung disease. Recently, within seve

Mickieb99's picture
[920]

my father has end stage lung disease. Recently, within seven days of each other, he blacked out behind the wheel of a car and the second time he had to be put on a ventilator for 36 hours. He spend 5 days in ICU and then went to a physical therapy inpatient rehab. He has been playing the good patient there and has convinced them that he is ready to go home, all by himself. I had at least set it up for him to have in-home care, but he somehow got that changed and now they are just "evaluating" his need for it. These accidents have changed him. We, his family, know this. He is not able to do what he used to do, and his disease is progressing, but he just won't accept it.

Today, I have to go pick him up from the center for his discharge and take him home, and then leave him there, all alone. If he blacks out again, he will die, because he will be alone and no one will know. But he has made up his mind that he is okay and that being alone is no problem. I am terrified of losing him. but I have to check my anxiety and respect his wishes, even if I know they are not in his best interest.

Just needed to vent. Thanks for listening.

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norseduncan's picture
[147495]
Mar 13

that is a really hard spot to be in. I am very sorry. you do have to respect his wishes, but you can check on him and make sure he's ok, can't you?

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[9325]
Mar 13

@mickieb99

I am sorry to hear that your father is so ill. I lost my father to lung cancer, too. Are there any family members who could take turns staying with your father? His doctor needs to tell him that he should not be living alone. You can hire a nurse to stay with him. Some insurances will help pay. I hope for the best.

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